Nesting Parties: A Modern Spin on Traditional Baby Showers

If you have a family member or close friend expecting a new baby soon, don’t be surprised if you’re invited to a nesting party instead of a traditional baby shower. And no, this nesting party has nothing to do with bird-watching.

Nesting parties are the latest prenatal trend, with friends and loved ones of the expectant parents gathering to help them prep for baby’s arrival.¹ This might include helping to wash, sort and organize baby clothes, paint the nursery, install a car seat or stock the freezer with premade meals.

While baby showers often celebrate this milestone with gift-giving and party games, nesting parties emphasize hands-on help for the expectant parents to create a comfortable and functional home environment before their little one makes their debut.

What Is Nesting?

According to the American Pregnancy Association, nesting refers to the biological instinct observed in most pregnant women to prepare for a newborn’s arrival.² Nesting generally means focusing on readying the home and preparing for postpartum care and routines.³

Nesting urges are common in the later stages of pregnancy, but not all women experience the same nesting instincts, or any at all, which is also normal. Some experts believe that for some expectant mothers, nesting helps relieve stress, anxiety or frustration during the later stages of pregnancy and helps foster feelings of comfort, excitement and connection to their baby.²

Nesting looks different for everyone. For some women, nesting could be a need to deep clean and organize the house, from cabinets to closets. Others may want to organize their baby’s clothes and diaper station or assemble cribs and bouncy seats. Still others may focus on getting as much rest and self-care as they can.³

It’s fine to follow nesting instincts, but with precautions. Pregnant women should avoid lifting heavy objects or climbing ladders and should steer clear of harsh chemicals like bleach, ammonia, oven cleaners and paint fumes. It's important to be mindful of energy levels, stay hydrated and pull back on activities before any exhaustion kicks in.²

How to Plan a Nesting Party

Traditionally, a baby shower is a more formal occasion with a theme, games, party favors and showering the soon-to-be-parents with items they’ll need for their newborn. Nesting parties tend to be smaller, informal gatherings that focus on acts of service: organizing, prepping, assembling and, of course, celebrating.⁴

While nesting parties aren't typically themed affairs, certain tasks might be highlighted, such as "Fill the Freezer" or "Stock the Changing Station," to give the day some focus. Likewise, many parents may have both celebrations: a baby shower earlier in the pregnancy and a nesting party in the final weeks. If the couple has a baby registry, nesting party guests can choose to fill in the items the parents still need from their list.

Nesting parties are also a great way to celebrate a seasoned mom who already has children and likely most of the baby gear. Helping her feel supported as she prepares for the arrival of another child may be far more valuable to her than new baby items.

Nesting party planning tips

A nesting party involves planning, coordination and logistics, while keeping the needs of the parents in mind. Some things to prepare for a nesting party include:

• Decide what tasks need to be done. While a nesting party doesn’t necessarily need to be themed, it’s a good idea to collaborate with the parents-to-be to determine which projects are at the top of their to-do list. Create an action plan for tackling those projects in the allotted time, and be mindful of trying to accomplish too much.⁴

• Choose a location. If the party will include activities like meal prepping, assembling baby gear or decorating a room, it makes sense to hold it at the home of the expecting mom.⁵ If hosting a group in that space isn’t feasible, a friend or family member can step in to host.

• Create a guest list. Like baby showers, nesting parties can be a single-sex gathering or a co-ed party that includes spouses and partners. Curate a short list of close friends and family based on the activities planned.⁴ For example, a party that involves meal prepping, organizing the nursery and putting together a crib might include 10 to 12 people. If you’re focusing on only one or two projects, a smaller group of five to six may be more appropriate. Too many guests with nothing to do are more likely to create stress than support.

Activity ideas for a nesting party

Nesting party guests can help the mom-to-be with a wide range of activities to make her feel prepared for the postpartum period. She might need her team to:

• Wash, fold and organize baby clothes by size. Clothes for baby to grow into can be stored in labeled boxes for easy reference.

• Prep freezer-friendly meals and postpartum snacks, like lactation cookies.

• Help prepare the nursery by assembling a crib, changing table or dresser; hanging a mobile or decorations; putting together a playmat or washing; and storing sheets, burp cloths and blankets.

• Conduct a trial run of baby gear. For example, set up baby monitors and test them in different rooms. Practice folding and unfolding a collapsible stroller or snapping a car seat carrier into and extracting it from the base. If either parent plans to use a wrap or other baby-wearing device, practice with a baby doll or a 5-pound bag of flour. Brush up on swaddling skills.

• Organize a feeding station with supplies like a breastfeeding pillow, water bottle, snacks for mom, sanitized bottles, bottle warmer, burp cloths, breast pump parts and wipes.

• Pack a hospital bag with toiletries, comfortable clothes, any necessary paperwork, copies of IDs and insurance cards, snacks, electronic chargers and baby’s coming-home outfit.

• Stock a diaper-changing caddy with diapers, wipes, changing pads and creams.
• Create a postpartum self-care kit that includes the mom-to-be’s favorite lotion, lip balm, herbal tea, flavored water, mineral bath salts, padsicles, comfy socks, pain relievers, music and reading material, snacks and index cards with words of encouragement.

Crafty guests might use this time to put the finishing touches on knitted blankets, handmade clothing or other items made with love to present to the expecting parents.

Nesting Party Etiquette

To ensure the day goes smoothly and is enjoyable for all, follow a few simple guidelines.

For guests

Remember that a nesting party is about supporting the parents-to-be with practical acts of service: cleaning, organizing, cooking or assembling are the main ingredients, with (hopefully) time for some relaxing and bonding as well.

Arrive prepared to work and accomplish household tasks as asked.⁵ Accommodate requests by the parents-to-be and refrain from offering unsolicited advice. For example, if mom asks that her baby's clothes are organized a particular way, go with the flow, even if it's not the way you'd do it.

Feel free to bring a small gift, such as items still on the couple's baby registry or a package of can-never-have-enough items like diapers, pacifiers and burp cloths.⁶

For expectant parents

Your family and closest friends are gathered to support you with acts of love and service — lucky you! Keep things organized by creating a list of tasks you'd like to get accomplished with clear instructions, and create separate workstations for efficiency.¹

Allow your guests to contribute using their best skills. If you have a friend who's a whiz at organizing, let them tackle a project that requires arranging and sorting. Your bestie is a fabulous baker? Ask them to whip up a batch or two of your favorite cookies, and let your cousin, who can assemble anything, tackle the crib.⁴

Consider creating small goodie bags of treats for your guests to take home, and follow-up thank-you notes are a must to express your love and appreciation.¹

Health and Wellness Tips for a Nesting Party

Though nesting parties are meant to be productive, they should be fun, too. The key is to keep things low-key and low-stress, the ideal setting for spending quality time with loved ones.

Provide easy finger foods, snacks, drinks and a playlist of favorite tunes.⁶ Don’t forget that food should be pregnancy-friendly, especially if the mom-to-be has been experiencing sensitivities to certain foods or smells.

Guests can help minimize germ exposure by washing their hands frequently and using hand sanitizer as needed.

If the vibe is right, mom and guests might enjoy some bonding time, relaxing with prenatal yoga and meditation, massage or a luxury foot bath.

Hosting a Virtual Nesting Party

Live streaming platforms, video calls and other technology make it possible for guests to participate in a nesting party even if they can’t attend in person. Online activities could include creating a digital scrapbook, supplying gift cards to a meal delivery subscription or cleaning service or organizing care packages to be sent after the baby arrives.⁶

Other ideas include sharing a recipe in advance if meal prepping is on the party agenda or setting up a shared playlist of favorites that other guests can add to.⁶

Celebrating a New Arrival With a Nesting Party

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Author Bio

Anne-Marie Kennedy is a freelance writer with more than 20 years of experience covering health and wellness, personal finance and real estate/investing.